|
High Tech Computer Sales Jargon
NEW - Different color from previous design.
ALL NEW - Parts not interchangable with previous design.
EXCLUSIVE - Imported product.
UNMATCHED - Almost as good as the competition.
DESIGNED SIMPLICITY - Manufacturers cost cut to the bone.
FOOLPROOF OPERATION - No provision for adjustments.
ADVANCED DESIGN - The advertising agency doesnt understand it.
ITS HERE AT LAST! - Rush job; Nobody knew it was coming.
FIELD-TESTED - Manufacturer lacks test equipment.
HIGH ACCURACY - Unit on which all parts fit.
DIRECT SALES ONLY - Factory had big argument with distributor.
YEARS OF DEVELOPMENT - We finally got one that works.
REVOLUTIONARY - Its different from our competitiors.
BREAKTHROUGH - We finally figured out a way to sell it.
FUTURISTIC - No other reason why it looks the way it does.
DISTINCTIVE - A different shape and color than the others.
MAINTENANCE-FREE - Impossible to fix.
RE-DESIGNED - Previous faults corrected, we hope....
HAND-CRAFTED - Assembly machines operated without gloves on.
PERFORMANCE PROVEN - Will operate through the warranty period.
MEETS ALL STANDARDS - Ours, not yours.
ALL SOLID-STATE - Heavy as Hell!.
BROADCAST QUALITY - Gives a picture and produces noise.
HIGH RELIABILITY - We made it work long enough to ship it.
SMPTE BUS COMPATABILE - When completed, will be shipped by Greyhound.
NEW GENERATION - Old design failed, maybe this one will work.
MIL-SPEC COMPONENTS - We got a good deal at a government auction.
CUSTOMER SERVICE ACROSS THE COUNTRY - You can return it from most airports.
UNPRECEDENTED PERFORMANCE - Nothing we ever had before worked THIS way.
BUILT TO PRECISION TOLERANCES - We finally got it to fit together.
SATISFACTION GUARANTEED - Manufacturers, upon cashing your check.
MICROPROCESSOR CONTROLLED - Does things we cant explain.
LATEST AREOSPACE TECHNOLOGY - One of our techs was laid off by Boeing.
|
